Less than a week ago my husband Larry was brought to the hospital in septic shock. He had been home 16 days after being hospitalized and in rehab for 8 weeks. The past few days have been a whirlwind as we have tried to come to grips with the reality of the situation. Once again, he has defied the odds simply by surviving. It is uncertain what the outcome will be. He has some hurdles to overcome. Doctors do see some improvement if you go strictly by the lab results. He was moved out of the ICU. We wait to see what the future holds.

As you can imagine, once word got out  that he was hospitalized I was bombarded with questions, including inquiries about how I am handling the crisis. I've pondered that question most of the week. It's been a roller coaster, to say the least.

In answer to the question about how I am doing, this is what came to mind:

I visualize the two of us walking together hand in hand along a path in the woods during our 32 years of marriage. Most of the time it has been a pleasant stroll. Yet sometimes the path has been rocky. There have been obstacles to maneuver around. Up to the mountain tops and down into the valleys we've traveled, helping one another, celebrating with one another, loving and living life.We walked the path together, always hand in hand. 

But now we have come to a fork. He must travel along one path. It is clear that I cannot go with him. I must travel my own path. Letting go is painful. At the moment, we are walking alone on parallel paths. We still have the other in sight. But the fork is veering off and soon we won't be able to see each other. I feel lost. Scared. Sad. Alone. 

God is with each of us, reassuring us He is still guiding us and we will each be alright. But like the child who falls and skins a knee, there are tears. It hurts. Our paths will meet up again. We will continue our journey once more. I trust in God and know He is in control.